Testo Hunkie
I write a monthly gossip column on Queer nightlife for Sticky Fingers Publishing. For my most recent column I went Testo Hunkie...
Five days into a month of sobriety I decided it was time for a Tequila ‘Rita Buzzball. My second journey south of the river within 3 weeks required whatever necessary to take the edge off and so I was on my way to my first Testo Hunkie at The Piehouse Co-Op in Deptford. The last time I was at The Piehouse Co-Op it was Matchstick Piehouse. I can’t remember much of the interior before because there wasn’t much to remember. But since then there’s been some kind of revamp and The Piehouse Co-Op has injected heaps of character into its interior which serves as a perfect venue for Testo Hunkie: a thematic party centering Trans masc/men and gender non-conformers.
The theme for June’s party was Euro Summer so obviously I rummaged through my wardrobe to find appropriate attire: a black skirt and a white top. Groundbreaking. Whilst busy chatting with my friend my awareness of the theme vacated my mind and I found myself wondering where the trend of colourful patterned shirts within the Transmasc community had come through. I thought I was at an event for people hoping to buy exotic pets.
Upon arrival I obviously noticed a 14-person deep queue for the bar. Apparently there had been a staff shortage issue so one person would be running the bar on their tod all night. In the meantime the hostess with the mostess Lori Mae was pitching in to help by doing what all Drag artists aspire to be doing several years into their careers in show business: pulling pints.
With the heavily worn-in, sunken sofas, posters and tables scattered throughout, Piehouse Co-Op was giving youth-club. The only thing missing was a little cubby hole selling fries and cans of coca cola…and a pool table. Maybe they should get a pool table.
With the queue for the bar having dwindled the arm wrestling took centre stage. Lori Mae hosted whilst her boyf Oskar managed the arm wrestling festivities. On her left a chalkboard was filled with the names of contestants (every attendee in the audience). Not everybody won and many people lost but there was a champion and I’m unsure who it was because I had to return to the long and winding queue for another drink.
Eli & Harrieta were DJing, they both ensured their choice of songs catered to the theme of the event: Euro Summer. It was delightful and extremely professional. Eli is the illustrator behind many of Testo Hunkie’s glorious posters and Harrieta runs Bodyswap @ Dalston Superstore w/ Karlie Marx. Harrieta’s partner Lorenzo is also another integral component of Testo Hunkie and alongside the host Lori Mae, they all collaborate to bring the vision of the posters to life within a co-operative venue that wholeheartedly supports the organisers and the Queer community at large, what with Testo Hunkie being run as a non-profit with all funds going towards gender-affirming fundraisers.
As we all know Queer night life, much like every single cultural sector at the minute, is on a steep decline towards doom. However, Testo Hunkie gave me an insight into the tireless efforts undertaken to ensure the party satisfies the clientele of younger transmascs and their enby, transgirl friends amidst the unforgiving climate that is our present day. Watching the hoards of attendees chatting, smiling and dancing away with one another goes to show how vital and indispensable the team behind Testo Hunkie are, instilling a slither of hope in times where genuine connection has become scarce
If you feel like you simply must arm wrestle in public, dance in an unjudgemental, punk af environment or just wish to meet likeminded transmasc, enby baddies whilst mingling on sunken sofas and surrounded by a queue in the shape of a snake, find Testo Hunkie on Insta and get yourself down to their next party.
Sticky Fingers Publishing are an independent publishers who run a monthly printed newsletter posted straight through your letterbox. It’s only £3 per month and features lots of articles, listings and sexy artwork so get subscribing immediately.
xox