2025: WRAPPED
is here with more layers, stories, and connection than ever before...
MINUTES LISTENED
You listened for 524,160 minutes to the world on the brink of collapse. It appears you spent the remaining 1,440 minutes intoxicated. A true party girl: bumpin’ that.
MOST LISTENED TO
You mostly listened to neoliberal politicians continuing to be a false flag for hope. Turns out, when push came to shove they chose to happily side with fascism!
You loved listening to the rights of the Trans community being brought to the Supreme Court without debate and being completely decimated. Hurrah!
Gaslighting was very in this year and you listened to a lot of it. Listening to anyone stating the fact of a genocide happening to Palestinians and they would immediately be labeled an anti-semite. It’s not up for debate, when will they ever learn?
One thing you really enjoyed listening to was a public figure finally standing up to the diabolical political rhetoric that’s become the norm. Zack Polanski was a refreshing pack of Starburst’s for your ears.
We may need to double check this one as it seems ‘Sweet Caroline’ was frequently listened to for a brief two week stint during the Summer. Our third party adjudicators are in the process of confirming a technical error on our part. Thank you for your patience as we look into this issue.
TOP ARTISTS
Your girlfriend looking for her vape
9/11
Paris Lees
Zack Polanski
Scrolling
TOP SONGS
Where is my vape?
Have you seen my vape?
Have you got my vape?
My vape’s ran out
Can you get me a vape?
TOP GENRES
The Trans “debate”
Genocide Lies
Whatever Nonsense Trump Decided to Say
The Challengers Soundtrack (get over it already)
Lost Mary Watermelon Ice
TOP PODCASTS
Steel beams Don’t Melt
Larry Silverstein Called in Sick
The Dancing Israeli’s
A Third Plane at the Pentagon?
How to Stage a Controlled Demolition
LISTENING AGE
Despite your hearing being that of an old-age pensioner you are in fact now 37…Yes, you’re 37 darling. You were born in the ‘80s.
TOP ALBUMS
Judging by our records you failed to listen to any albums in full this year, despite many new albums being released. Our research has shown a drop in album streams may correlate to the general widespread phenomena of dwindling attention spans. If you are able to get through at the allotted slot between 08:00am-08:01am, we recommend you book a call in with your GP ASAP. In the meantime, please try to reduce the constant use of your phone during the day. HTe big screen is there for a reason. Happy streaming!